Thursday, September 12, 2013

Maybe I Can't Take Medication for My Disorders...

I've been on this buspirone since Sunday, and I'm not sure this is working for me.

Last week, even with all of my wedding nervousness, I was able to get through it with self-talk, breathing techniques, and a couple of Xanax when I knew I was going to get out of control. (And a tiny, tiny bit of drinking.)

This week, I've had absolutely nothing that's incredibly stressful come up, but I'm tired, sometimes uncoordinated, sometimes lightheaded, a little irritable and I'm having those long, drawn-out, meticulous, exhausting stress dreams every night.

No stress dreams last week, even with a massive amount of stress.

Am I just destined to not get any comfort from regular medication?

Is it because of the fears I have of going into another period of numb indifference like when I was on Lexapro?

I mean, last week I was doing so much better primarily because I just upped my exercise and kept going. This week, I feel too tired to really get going on it. In the middle of exercising, I'll lose count or I'll just kind of get bored and drift off.

I think I'm going to stop taking this.

Maybe the only real solution is to stay clear-headed but active.


DrGoat said...

Buspirone can cause a lot of the side affects you're feeling. Anti-anxiety drugs can have all kinds of uncomfortable side affects, I'm sure you know all about. SSRI's like Lexapro and Xoloft had the exact opposite affect on me. My anxiety got worse. I'm on some Lyrica before I go to bed and it helps.

SamuraiFrog said...

I was thinking of taking an alprazolam before bed, but I just fell right to sleep last night and woke up much more clear-headed than I have the past few nights. No stress dreams, no exhaustion.

Those dreams are the worst, because they're so detailed and lucid that it's basically like being only half-asleep all night.

DrGoat said...

Sounds good. Don't you love it when something like that happens? A good nights sleep can change your whole outlook on things. Hope it's a trend. Hate those lucid dreams too. They are always bad in nature, but I don't have too many since I've been on Lyrica, but some of them I can still remember. Life is strange.