One of my favorite blogs right now is The Absorbascon. It's the best and funniest comics blog I've ever read. Which is why I was saddened to find this post, which says, in large part:
It seems that it is no longer possible for me to post on this blog without some commenter, often an anonymous one, telling me "that's not funny" or "I used to like you better when". [. . .] That's very emotionally draining to me. Unless you have spent the kind of time and effort that a blogger does to post daily (or nearly so), you can't imagine how unmotivating it is to be heckled nearly daily. Some may be clapping for you, but it still stings just as hard when the tomato hits you.
I'm not sure why people do this. If I don't care for a blog or it no longer interests me, I simply stop reading it. If you wish bloggers to post particular types of things, praise them lavishly when they do. Dissing them when what they post doesn't tickle your particular fancy that day serves only to move them one step closer to quitting.
Which I am. I am walking away from this blog for one month. I'll return in one month at which point I'll decide whether I want to start it up again or not. That should give those who don't like what I post time to break the habit of showing up daily to tell me so; they can move on to ruin someone else's enjoyment of another blog. Perhaps they can also ponder why there are fewer and fewer blogs left for them to criticize.
I know exactly how Scipio feels. It is unmotivating. Most of us who do blogs just want an outlet to talk about things that interest us, to bring things to the attention of other people, to share things, to vent. And every once in a while, you get a worthy debate (like I did yesterday with my post about Britney Spears). But a lot of times it's just people being snarky because they don't like the woman you put up pictures of (and then judging your entire sense of aesthetics based on that) or because they think their taste in movies is so much better than yours. And that's how people are; it would be unrealistic to think that opening myself up in a forum like this isn't going to bring me some of that. What's annoying is that a lot of people don't ever seem to feel the need to comment unless they completely disagree with you about something. If it leads to something interesting, that's great. If it's just some snarky quip, it's incredibly irritating. If it's open hostility, that's completely disheartening.
On the other side, I do get a lot of compliments and an incredible amount of support. Most of the people who come here don't seem to be under the incredibly mistaken impression that I write my blog so that they can approve what I post. Those are my favorites. A lot of my readers are friendly and supportive and a blast to have comment. No one wants to do their blog in a void, uncertain of whether or not anyone is even looking. But I always think of a post Angela put up several months ago, in which she said "I don't write my blog for you."
A lot of people seem to be going through this. Rudeness is tiresome. I hate that it's affecting bloggers that I like.
The blogosphere is going to be a lonely place one day.
9 comments:
This isn't a problem I have on my blog - and I don't think it would bother me if I did - but I have noticed something in the air.
This has nothing to do with it, yet it does. I responded on a letters thread about "Lost" on Salon, where all these people were whining about the so-called decline of the show and whining that the characters were whining and whining that they were giving the show one, no, two more chances and then, that was it!
I pointed out that it seemed silly to keep watching something they didn't like and whining that they didn't like it when they could just stop watching it instead of giving it chances and continuing to whine about it.
I was promptly berated for even suggesting such a thing.
The point is that I missed the point - or rather, I pretended to in order to make the point yet again.
The direct communication, the immediate back and forth, and the digital mask that the Internet provides makes some people drunk with . . . well, powerlessness. Sniping has no real power, but it makes them feel like they're getting their say.
Ditto blogs. Back in the day, you would have to type out a double spaced letter to the editor in a newspaper to have your say. Consequently, only motivated people had their public say. Now everyone with a cheap ass computer they bought from Wal-Mart, $10 a month for internet access, and a basic understanding of the English language can go around and tell people how they feel about anything they stumble upon.
It's the downside of democracy - even petty people have a voice.
Jaron Lanier recently did a column about the hostility that seems to be a natural part of internet anonymity, but tried to blame it on the so-called counterculture and the design of online culture. I think certainly the ease of access gives people not only makes it easier to do a drive-by, like you said, but also that people just like the power of seeing their words make an impact, no matter how poorly thought out they are. That's why, on rare occasions, I've just deleted those comments. Taking their words away hurts them.
This is part of what's come from this claptrap we push on children that they are entitled to their opinions and their opinions are all unique and important, when, as Harlan Ellison pointed out, people are only titled to their INFORMED opinion.
A blog I like - Swapatorium - is having the same problem, and had a similar post yesterday.
Excerpt:
Do you keep a blog? If you do, you would know it is not as easy as it seems to update it on a continual basis, especially after 2 1/2 years. So take this site for what it is, or move one, but please, don't threaten me that you and your buddies will stop reading if it doesn't change.
It does get irritating.
I've been fortunate that my current blogging experience has been relatively criticism-free, but I have neither the audience nor the long tail that EC has at the moment but from my previous blogging experience I do understand that effect of constant criticism can have on a writer.
If you are a quipper, you generally inflame the situation, and even the most innoculous of topics become battlegrounds.
I do know that if someone left me a comment saying they didn't enjoy certain topics I cover, well, that would be there problem, not mine. There has never been a blog, even my own, which had me enthralled 100% of the time. That is just a fact of life really.
Most of the people who come here don't seem to be under the incredibly mistaken impression that I write my blog so that they can approve what I post
You are almost certainly going to blast this as more whining and criticism or as just "missing the point," but --- and I say this with sincere respect for your blogging and as a fan of both your pop and high culture writing:
sometimes, you seem to think that comment that don't agree with you 100% are attacks, or they imply that you need approval of others. And sometimes, you're right about that. But a lot of times, comments that happen to express a different view are just that --- a commenter, enjoying the interactive world for what it is, and replying with his or her own druthers. I mean, that's what the comments are there for, right? You don't want everyone to just chime in with, "right on, Samurai Frog!", do you? So I may be wrong, but it seems to me sometimes the rage that you often tout takes over when you read comments that are actually pretty innocuous, and you only read them as attacks.
MC: On the other hand, sometimes people just leave a note that's genuinely funny and makes me laugh. You're right, it is life.
Chance: God help me, the last thing I need is a blog where all people do in the comments section is agree with me. I've been to the rare blogs that are like that, and they get boring and smug because they think they can't go anything wrong (and, depressingly, they seem to back down when challenged by a negative comment, even a constructive one).
This post wasn't necessarily about my own experience. I do have the occasional self-important twat who comments grandly and makes personal judgments about me, and that does get irritating (look at the pointlessness on almost every one of the now 37 comments on my post about hating Orlando Bloom). But mostly the discourse here is interesting and/or entertaining. I'd much rather have it be that than just compliments. But I have seen how the negativity builds up for people like Scipio.
Really, it's people who are anonymous and who are just passing by and decide they have to call you a name because you're "so negative." Those are the worst, because they intend to be hurtful.
funny, everyone loves me.....
what is not to love c'mon....
Damn straight!
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