Angelina Jolie announced that she, too, is going to take part in this ridiculous epidemic that is actresses not taking their clothes off anymore. Now, it's not that I'm resentful or anything, but I've just always had this problem taking any actor, male or female, seriously if they take an anti-nudity stance. I'm sorry, but, if you have a problem taking your clothes off, you're not an actor to me. Because a real actor is thinking about the character. A celebrity is thinking about what her kids are going to say about it. And a celebrity is not really an actor; an actor thinks about the art...a celebrity thinks about their career. And I especially don't respect Angelina Jolie for saying that she's going to stop taking her clothes off because she doesn't want her kids to be embarrassed. Way to hide behind your kids and what society thinks. Didn't that used to be the opposite of what Angie was all about?
At least Angelina is, like, a real actress. She's given some of the greatest performances any actor has given in the last decade; she should have won an Oscar for Gia. I know it was an HBO movie and wasn't eligible, but fuck it, that was the best female performance of 1998. But when Jessica Alba says she's not going to take her clothes off, that's especially ridiculous. Why does she think she's famous? Because everyone is waiting with bated breath to see her dramatic reading of Goethe? Or because she's getting in a bikini and sticking her ass in the camera all the time? And when I hear Scarlett Johansson, who is so greatly blessed with talent, say something that stupid, I just think about how she's already stopped being conscious of her art and is only concerned with her career.
Seriously, whose career does nudity hurt? Jane Fonda didn't shy away from nudity in the sixties and seventies, and she won two Oscars. Emma Thompson, also a multiple Oscar winner, is no stranger to nudity. Ditto Oscar winner Susan Sarandon. Jennifer Connelly, who won a Supporting Actress Oscar for a lead role in 2001, has graced the screen with her natural beauty. Kate Winslet, who deserves to have won an Oscar, has never let nudity hinder her being one of the best actresses alive (and thank you so much for that, my darling Winslet). And check this action out: Jodie Foster, Holly Hunter, Gwyneth Paltrow, Hilary Swank, Halle Berry, and Charlize Theron won Oscars for movies that they were actually naked in. Helen Hunt at least wore that wet tee shirt in As Good as It Gets and Julia Roberts didn't win an Oscar until she pushed her boobs up to her chin in Erin Brockovich, which goes to show that sometimes good cleavage can supercede a lack of talent. Nicole Kidman got to Hollywood by flashing her pretty pink Christmas ornament of a heart-shaped ass in Dead Calm; now she, too, is an Oscar winner. And though no one seems to remember it, a plumper, more attractive Reese Witherspoon got her kit off in Twilight in 1998.
What I'm getting at is this: nudity doesn't hurt anyone's career. It's all about the talent. Kate Winslet could have descended into bad B movies, but she was too talented and too determined to be a great actress, so it never happened. And if you're thinking about what other people will think, you're not in the moment, and you're not acting. And don't pull that "it's gratuitous" saw on me, because that's a non-starter. Every single thing that happens in a movie is gratuitous. Nothing in a movie is necessary. Do you think all of the violence we see in movies is necessary? Think carefully about that. Because there were several glorious decades of moviemaking without graphic violence and without nudity that were still able to get the point across.
I'm just sorry that one of our best actors, Angelina Jolie, has decided to cave in to the celebrity life. But it's her choice. Just as it's my choice to not take her seriously as an actor anymore.
Simple Tricks and Nonsense | The official website of R. Jason Bennion. Mostly I'm just an analog kind of guy lost in a digital world…