Hey, I'm Morgan Spurlock, Genius. Alone among the human race, I realized that eating at McDonald's can make you fat. And I used that realization to make a character piece about myself that I was somehow able to pass off as a documentary! Yay, me! Hey, want to see me do something funny? I mean, I am a total publicity whore!
Hee hee hee! Me want Oscar! Me hug like little boy with need for self-esteem through attention! Me take home! Me want! Me me me me me me me!
Heh. Stupid white people.
Motherfucker. I'm the humor talent in this room. Represent!
Taco chihuahua le mierda chilupa de yip yip!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Look, honey, a retard. Isn't it cute?
That's good. Heh heh heh.
Mm, yes, humorous.
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Oh, Christ, that is pants-shittingly funny! Wha-HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! Oh, there it goes! HAHAHAHAHA! POOP!
Seriously, Marty, take a pill. It's not THAT funny.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! It's the funniest fuckin' thing anyone's ever done! I can't breathe! HAHAHAHAHA!
Stupid American idiots. This is not funny. I am going home.
I hear you, Frenchie. I mean, I don't even dig this, and I'm Jamie Foxx, you feel me?
Would you like to take me home so that I CAN feel you, Mr. Black Man?
I'm high on X right now, so this is mildly amusing.
Nobody knows who I am.
WHOOOO! I LOVE ATTENTION! Hey, watch me, I'm gonna hump this thing right here!
My God...will he do it? Will he cross the final frontier? What a brave, brave, needy man, desperate for validation.
Hmm, I wonder how I'll do my hair tonight...
Yay! Everyone's watching me! Hey, watch me lay down Oscar and give it what for! 30 days, baby!
Alright, this has gone on long enough. I'm going to ditch this scene and find me some bitches. Peace out, yo.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *choke* Oh, man, that is comedy genius, I tell ya! I can't get enough! HAHAHAHAHA!
Hey, Leo, how'd you like to play this guy in a movie? I smell Oscar! Hey, that could be the name of the movie: "I Smell Oscar," a moderately competent workmanlike film by Martin Scorsese.
It's as though I can feel every individual strand of hair... Wooooo...
Enougha this shit! I'm putting the focus of the Oscars back to its rightful place: the old!
Oh, yeah! Gimme that! Yeah, you like that, huh, bitch! Take it! Fuck you, Spurlock!
Coward. I knew Spurlock would bitch out. They always do.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh, fuck, it's even funnier now! Oh, Jesus! *wheeze* Ow, my heart! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Man, this is some fucked up, unfunny shit.
Oscars, man. I mean...woooow, Oscars...
Wow, hey, Warren Beatty! I need more attention! Can I hump YOU for the cameras?
I would so do me right now.